More Than Four Sides

Category: Family & Friends

  • Providing an anchor, an invisible rope

    “…my eye beams a rope around her, because I will jump in—splash!—and rescue her the moment she’s in difficulty.  And then she’s twelve years old, self-conscious in a modest navy sports swimsuit, …[but] she’s still the little girl in the pink-and-orange flowery swimming costume to me, and I still have my invisible rope around her…

  • Reckless parenting

    Parenting in the 21st century (in the US) is full of caution, supervision and anxiety. No one could have imagined the term “helicopter parents” 50 years ago. My parents were both incredibly bright and gifted graduate students when they met, married, and started a family. My mother was very anxious and cautious in her parenting…

  • The mortality thing

    OK, so I promised, a couple of days ago, to fill in on the discussions around Death (yes, with a capital D) that have been a constant theme of the past month.  We have heard, time and time again, about how J had a mommy and a daddy who died, and how he didn’t come…

  • Still pondering mortality…

    This morning continued a theme which has been running strong for 5-yo J for the past two days, but, I realize, thanks to this blog, that its been a theme for the whole month, starting with this post – death, and most particularly, what to make of the death of one’s parents. But, I’m not…

  • Mulling over mortality

    On the way to preschool today, J asked, “Why did Reaghan have to die? I wish she was still alive.” “All animals have to die sometime – dogs, and even people”, I answered. “Lions don’t die – they kill other animals”, was his comeback. “Yes, even lions die when they get old.” “No! Lions only…

  • Secrets & Lies

    When I was in my early teens, my Sri Lankan aunt (my father’s sister), had my stars read by her astrologer. She asked me for the exact time of my birth, and the exact place I was born. And, after a few weeks, I got a folded piece of thin paper with quite a number…

  • Happy New Year!

    2012 will soon be in the past, and, in a few hours, we launch into 2013! Image from http://scienceblogs.com/startswithabang/files/2011/07/fireworks.jpeg And, by all accounts, we will fall off the fiscal cliff! Image from http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2012-12-23/fiscal-cliff-through-eyes-cartoonists So, since we can’t do anything about the fiscal cliff, or about the clock ticking away inexorably toward midnight, we packed the…

  • Visiting preschool

    I finally made it to my clinic’s annual Christmas party. I’ve missed it all the years I’ve worked there, and I always get grief from my patients who come see me shortly after the New Year for not being there. But, I’d been thinking about how to fit my attendance at this party into my…

  • The worst headache…

    I was driving to work, later than usual due to some clinginess on J’s part. I was heading north on I-95, listening to the non-stop coverage of the Sandy Hook Elementary school shooting last week, when my phone rang. The display on my car showed a number I didn’t recognize. I hit the “Answer” button.…

  • The Anarchist Soccer Mom: Thinking the Unthinkable

    The Anarchist Soccer Mom: Thinking the Unthinkable. I am sharing this story because I am Adam Lanza’s mother. I am Dylan Klebold’s and Eric Harris’s mother. I am Jason Holmes’s mother. I am Jared Loughner’s mother. I am Seung-Hui Cho’s mother. And these boys—and their mothers—need help. In the wake of another horrific national tragedy,…